After all, she was recently divorced and still hurting. I was married; not happily, but none-the-less married. I had been involved in what might be best termed a "Christian cult" most of my adult life. My wife and I had limited sexual experience. While sex was never "bad", neither was it exciting. In fact, it was more than five years into marriage before my wife would let me give her oral sex. Now, after twelve years, we had sex maybe once every six months! As I approached forty mid-life crisis was about to rear its head. For some time I'd been questioning the decisions I'd made at nineteen about the lifestyle I was living (no, not BDSM or swinging, but prayer meetings and communal living). I questioned my marriage as well for we had truly grown in completely different directions. Life is the result of the choices we make along the way. After trying to live according to "God’s Will " for twenty years, I was about to exercise free will. Sandi would be the catalyst for the. And Kaizee says to add it to my list of things to forget about, and I am,and that he probably would have looked like an idiot looking at any girl,and he probably didn't know it was me because lots of people look alike,and that most people don't decide that you're a very special kinda girlwhen they see you even if your lips are thin or jaw too big a little,because lots of other girls have that too. And that it might not havebeen him anyway.And Lisa wants to tell Amanda, and I'm afraid she will, even though Ihave blackmail things on her, because Amanda might not even care orunderstand or already know about that thing. And Ms Y says that therewill probably be more people that I have to tell, and even said thatAmanda would be one of the best ones to let in on it, but that there arelots of people that will understand. And I don't want that, Marsha!! You know!! Because they won't understandno matter what they say, OK? And I don't know if all these people that "understand" now are trying.
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