Maybe I would have eternity to clear it up. For some reason I remembered just when I’d lost Hope.My mid-life crisis hit the day I realized thirty-three was half-way through my life expectancy. Of course, technically, having already survived Viet Nam, I should have had a much longer life expectancy than the sixty-six that was estimated in 1982, but apparently I had seriously over-estimated.At thirty-three, I’d just been promoted to full partner and celebrated by buying a brand new bright yellow Mustang convertible. I moved to a new apartment in a trendy part of town where I could hold huge parties for young, equally trendy people. There was just one thing missing in my life, and I went hunting for a beautiful, young, and trendy girlfriend. Hope springs eternal.Hope was her name.We met at the top of Mt. Si on a Saturday afternoon, looking across the lowlands toward Puget Sound. We hiked back down the mountain together and shared a drink at a cozy North Bend watering hole. Much to my. .. erm ... playing with yourself for hours you say?”“Yes Mom.”“Gee, that is a lot of wasted time. How on earth do you last that long without ... y’know ... ejaculating?”“I dunno, I just sort of stop for a little while when I feel it building.”“I see. So what exactly do you ... think about when you’re ... tugging it?”We both giggled at her use of that phrase but I could tell that mom was genuinely curious.“Mom, I don’t know if we should be talking abou...”“It’s OK honey,” Mom assured me with a smile “I won’t freak out. We need to get to the bottom of this so tell me honestly.”“Well, honestly, Mom I think mostly about you ... in a sexual way.”“I must admit Dan, although I’m flattered, I am very shocked at this confession.”“I know mom, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anyth...”“Incestuous sex is illegal, and could damage our relationship as mother and son beyond repair. You don’t want that, do you?”“No mom,” She made a very valid point even if my dick didn’t agree.“However, these.
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