She went along to each of his school plays, but after his beaming face spotted her in the crowd, the wetness that followed was like a kick in the stomach, and she never risked it again.But constantly being on guard like that, deliberately having to deprive your son, that changes a person. And over the years, Marion became more and more bitter. It was done out of love for her son—a good mother, she knew, should not find her own son a turn-on, and constantly making sure that he never got an ounce of pleasure from her, it turned Marion into a harsh and hostile person.Placing a thought into someone's head is an interesting gambit. Once it's out of your hands, the possibilities for interpretation are endless. "Pleasing your son turns you on" had, in Marion's head, become all-inclusive. "Pleasing your son turns you on" meant, to her, that nothing else did, and so to add to Marion's joyless existence, she couldn't even find relief in masturbation. Any time she tried, her mind turned to her. No dressing it up this was an invitation to fuck, no dinner or movie, no social niceties just come on over and fuck the hell out of me. What if he was some kind of freak, but well, in a way wasn’t that what she wanted? A freak that would make her naughtiest fantasies come true. Someone that would push her limits and sensibilities past reason to where she could find true delight. And that’s how she ended up here tonight, waiting for Alex, a stranger she met on some website who had promised her a night of raw sex and pleasure. Moving from the living room window back to the chaise she sits down and curls her feet underneath her. Nancy has agonized over this rash decision the entire night before and barely slept a wink, her thoughts chasing each other through her brain all night. At 2 am she finally gave up any pretense of trying to sleep and began to clean. Her house now sparkled but she was no closer to being relaxed than before. Maybe if she just closed her eyes a minute she would.
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