To them was granted the long, arduousrow that would take them to Tharbad where they would build defensesstout as their hearts and firm as their will."In turn we sailed further North to the shores of Lindon where most ofthe host, under my command, put ashore to confront the dark invader andhis forces. I do not wish to dwell long on the battles that took place,it is a topic best left to history books and kept out of polite society,instead I will say that though the enemy's number was large they werealso weary of the fight. Therefore, they were dismayed when we joinedthe fray against them. Soon they ran Eastward and we pursued, harryingthem on every step on which they had last walked triumphant. But soonthey could run no more, for in their path was Vanger acting as anvilupon which we could crush the enemy host. And we did, until their leaderwith only a handful of bodyguard flew away, leaving his followers to ournot so tender mercies angered as we were by the terrible price thatVanger. I'd never had much luck with the ladies — my own fault — because I was overweight, had a scraggly beard I refused to get rid of (it covered my double chin) and I looked every bit the nerd I was right down to the pocket protector and the adhesive tape holding my glasses together. The women I knew well enough to ask all turned me down so I did something totally out of character for me; I called an escort service and made an appointment. I showed up on time, filled out a questionnaire and after it was reviewed I was told they couldn't help me."If you had told me on the phone the date of the awards ceremony I could have saved you a trip down here. All my girls are booked for that night."She sat there looking at me for several moments and I could tell she was thinking of something. Finally she said:"I might be able to help you, but I will warn you ahead of time that the girl I'm thinking of doesn't have many of the social graces. She is great looking if all you need is 'arm candy', but.
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