. but I wasn't sure that many would actually go through with it if given the chance. So why was I going through with it?My mind went numb as I remembered the smell of her perfume. That wonderful sent that would soon be with me constantly. Images of her long black hair reaching down just past the arch of her back; those beautiful tan legs closing around me as she shared with me her most intimate moments ... filling me with part of her self ... using me ... in the most degrading way imaginable ... To experience that day after day, for me at least, is worth suffering for ... and even dying for.But for a moment, when the car arrived 5:59pm, I felt that panicked sensation once again. My life is over if I step into that car. My heart raced as it pulled to the curb. I nearly turned around and walked away before I heard his voice. It was Alex. He stepped around from behind the car and opened the door for me."I was afraid you might get cold feet."Alex said with a big smile.My mind went blank. And then a welcome return to nothingness.This time he felt like he would stay awake, or at least that he could if he wanted to. He wasn't sure if he wanted to. His head pounded, keeping regular time with his heartbeat. Aside from the pain, there was the fatigue. He remembered now that it was the tremendous fatigue that had overtaken him during his earlier, brief period of consciousness.His eyes were still closed, and before opening them, Malfoy focused his thoughts on the present. He had been hurt - that much was clear, for this was the dominant thought in his mind the moment he surfaced. But how? He was unable make his mind go backwards in an organized way, and so he went far back, and worked his way forwards. He remembered getting on the Hogwarts express, in the compartment with his Slytherin friends. Then falling asleep briefly, waking up just as the train was arriving.No one there to meet him - not the first time this had happened. He'd been angry. Every other student had at.
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