‘I don’t understand what I could do’ he said. ‘You are not a child anymore. You have grown up and can take care of her’ she said. ‘But she is not so friendly with me. She always bosses over me’ he replied. ‘May be you take advantage of her’ said Naina. ‘I don’t other than ask for some Pocket money’ he said. ‘And when you get money you forget her, is it not’ she asked. ‘Yes, so it is’ he replied softly. ‘You enjoy with your friends when she is left all alone’ she said. ‘I do go out with my friends’ replied Amar. ‘Girl Friends?’ ‘Sometimes’ he replied shyly. ‘Why don’t you treat her like your girl friend’ she said. ‘You mean . . . .’ ‘Yes that is what I mean. Take her out, be a companion to her and treat her like a girl friend’ she said. ‘Where shall I take her’ he asked. ‘Where do you take your girl friends, tell me,’ she asked. ‘I take them out, sometimes to a movie’ he replied. ‘What do you do there’ she asked looking straight in his eyes. ‘Can’t tell you that’ he replied shyly.. During my formative years, I often questioned myself - Why Me? Why didI have this compulsion that I was not in the right gender; why did Ifeel female - was it to be closer to my mother? I searched librariesfor magazines, books that dealt with how I felt, I saw medicalprofessionals about this, most of them thought I had a psychologicalproblem that needed my parents' intervention. I simply became moresecretive and paranoid. I kept my parents in the dark about my secretit was never easy. I was blessed with a USAF locker, a gift from mybrother Ted. I kept my life locked away.I did many things growing up that I should have put in jail for; I useda paper route as a cover for casing and breaking/entering houses. Iused the paper bags for carrying off the goods. I used my family andparent's reputation for obtaining stolen items. These items all haveone thing in common; all were feminine items - clothing, makeup, wigs,lingerie, and shoes. Some times I would take money so I could.
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