She didn’t think anyone would stand up so she asked him, “Why did you stand up?”He answered, “I didn’t want to leave you standing up by yourself.”A man decided to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $ 5,000 and feels really good about the result. On his way home he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper. Before leaving he says to the salesclerk, “I hope you don’t mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?”“About 35,” was the reply. “I’m actually 47,” the man says, feeling really happy. After that he goes into McDonalds for lunch, and asks the order taker the same question, to which the reply is, “Oh you look about 29.”“I am actually 47.” This makes him feel really good.While standing at the bus stop he asks an old woman the same question. She replies, “I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I was young there was a sure way of telling a man’s age. If I put my hand down your pants and play with your hairy walnuts for ten minutes I will be able to tell your. I'm the night watch at a Elder Community. I walk around, late at night, making sure the community is secure. Five and a half years and we've never had so much as a car drive by after midnight but the oldies in here feel better knowing I'm there.They wouldn't, of course, if they knew me.Take Mrs. Featherstone, for instance. Her meds knock her out. I slip into her unit every night — she's always first. I used to tip-toe around but ever since I broke a glass once and got it cleaned up without her waking, I don't even bother. Her bedroom has one of the security lights outside shining in so I can see just as if it were daylight. She sleeps through me moving the sheet and lifting her nightgown. She wears granny panties, which I find incredibly hot. I usually wack off on them and then find a towel in the hamper to wipe it off with. Then, I move the panties and let my eyes feast on the hairy, wrinkly pussy. I play with the gray hairs for a minute or two and then I finger the flesh. I have to.
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