? She pauses as she considers the question. “I’ve thought about it a bit. It’s very naughty – but I like naughty ... I don’t mind – I’ve had sex with men I don’t like before, just to, like, make them like me ... Or to get revenge on another girl or whatever. There was a girl at school who I hated, and – after we left school, mind – I slept with her dad just to mess with her head ... He was ancient – like 45 or something, and fat ... But I let him do everything to me just so I could send her the pictures!”So you enjoy a little deviant fun ... Do you think you’ll enjoy being with a dog?“I’ll enjoy doing it on camera, knowing that everyone is watching ... I’ll enjoy everyone talking about me, or coming up to me in the street and asking if that was me... ?What if they don’t talk to you? Some of our former subjects say they’ve been ignored, or verbally abused for being on the show... “That’ll be what some people will do ... But the point is that they will know me, even if they don’t talk. She talked about the men who wanted her, and thanks to his gentle questioning gradually began to accept that some at least wanted to help her, and were not using the situation to further their own lust.She talked about how hard it was to get up each morning and go to work, about how angry it made her that everyone’s life had carried on as if Neill had never lived. She talked of her guilt that she’d not sat on the right of the car instead of the left, and he suggested that this was guilt that she had survived the accident and he had not.She asked if he’d seen that sort of guilt in the army.He nodded. “Often,” was all he said, but she could see there were deep feelings there.She cried a lot and Victor was not embarrassed but patiently allowed her to revisit her grief again and again and her acute sense of having been cheated out of their life together. He often held her in his arms as she sobbed, and she told him she felt comforted.It was on the seventh day that Victor spoke his own.
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