Her eyes were blinking back tears but her voice was steady as she continued. "Early, I've never been faithful to anyone in my whole life. You are the only man I've ever loved, and it tears me apart to admit this to you, but if I lie by pretending it was only that one time, I'll come of looking so much better than I am."She was studying his face again, trying to get some clue as to how he was responding. The problem was that Early couldn't give her a clue because he couldn't understand himself. "I'm not a slut and I'm not some sort of nymphomaniac. I told you I would never be with another man and I haven't, but you deserve to know just what a horrible person you married."It started with my first. It wasn't my boyfriend; I was cheating on him because I was mad at him because... I don 't suppose why I was mad matters, but I discovered I loved the feeling of being with someone for the first time. When we discussed our lovers, I told you I'd had three lovers. That was true. What I didn't. Pat started to say thank you and John complimented me on my fast learning and the easiness I had when playing. I said that it had been easy enough and well explained when John said “so you play the violin, whistles, and recorder? And what else?” “I said “A little flute, but not much, I like the whistles and recorders better” and he looked at me and said “you’re a fast learner, maybe you would like to learn playing other instruments as well…”. Pat grabbed his guitar and said “I’ll show you” and before I knew it, I was between his legs with a guitar on my knees and his hands over mine, showing me how to do it. I felt afraid and exited. I had had boyfriends, but these guys were really “big boys”, not young teenagers anymore. And he touched me… John was sitting with his back against the wall, watching us, watching me… and then, he stretched out his hand and started caressing my foot, in a non-committing way. When he saw I didn’t protest, he moved just a little closer and started moving.
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