She then paused, and then looked down. “I just wanted…” she trailed off. “What is it sweetie?”, I said, finding myself moving closer to her. “I just wanted to say thank you”, she said. “You’ve just been so nice.” I smiled. “Well, it’s my job to be welcoming.” Ashley looked straight into my eyes. “Well, you’re very good at it.” There was an awkward silence, we just looked at each other for what seemed like forever. My eyes became lost in hers as I felt myself walk toward her. She had me entranced as I found myself dangerously close to her. I felt my hands wrap around her hips as we looked into each other’s eyes. I wasn’t thinking anymore; I was just acting. My arms were wrapping around her as she pressed herself up against me. Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion as my mouth inched closer to hers. Before our lips touched, I whispered to her, “You’re so beautiful.” She closed her eyes as she succumbed herself to me. I kissed her hard, hungrily, and she reciprocated with. I envied my sisters and theirfemale friends. I played with other boys well enough, and being seminobility we were expected to learn swordplay and fighting and ridingwarhorses and so on but I never liked any of it, not even the pretend stuffthat boys do. I wanted to be like my sisters and have more intimate fun andtheir pretty clothes. They got compliments about how pretty they were. Iwanted that too."As I grew to become a .. man... my feelings did not change, and I stillfound myself looking a little enviously at girls, singly or in groups. Theyalways seemed to look after their appearance and kept fresh and clean, moreso than men. I think that much of it is the joy of just being young women,enjoying life, and their friends, yes, their own bodies and having pride inthem."I wish that I had been born a girl and grow up to get a lovely curvedfigure with breasts and a slim waist and wide hips and more intimate parts,not a hairy body with and ugly dangling penis and scrotum. Yes, I.
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