His staying there all evening was then assured by the need to look after the child if Sandra was out, so he probably wouldn't walk in on them.Sandra had other mothers nearby who were friends, so that if Alan was out at some event or other, she would arrange a minder and try to visit Martha.Alan lied a lot to both of them about his outside activities, and claimed to have nights out with the boys, which he sometimes left early and turned up at Martha's on the off-chance. To a certain extent this was annoying, but he paid the rent and Martha did not want to anger him by turning him away too often. In any case, the door opened for him, so the first she knew that he was visiting on nights like that was when he walked in.Martha's had much more complete domination of Sandra than she had ever had of Alan. As long as Martha was prepared to abuse Sandra freely, Sandra would oblige by doing anything for her beloved Mistress.Sandra told Martha everything she did in the bedroom with Alan and with. Now she wished she hadn’t, but she talked herself through the attack slowly: Just breathe, she reminded herself. One breath at a time and you’ll be okay. Just breathe…In about a minute, it passed. She sighed, relieved. Then she remembered John was still there and, embarrassed turned to look at him. “I’m sorry. I’m okay. It was nothing you did. I just have this…condition.”“Oh. Oh! Is it serious?”“No!” she said. “It’s not. I just get these panic attacks sometimes, and when I do I have to slow down. It’s no big deal.”“I get it,” he said. Half-undressed on the couch, he looked a bit awkward. “I was moving too fast. If you need to go—”“I don’t,” she said, and took his hand. “That is, if you don’t want me to?” He shook his head. She smiled, relieved. But now, a puzzle: How to do this without running the risk of exerting herself too much? She eyed his sitting position and said, “Stay right where you are. I want to try something.”He half-jumped when she undid his belt buckle, but then.
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