I can already feel the tingling as I kneel down and slip itonto the lowest level of the bookshelf between a dictionary and athesaurus. It should be simple for me, even as a toddler, to access itwhen the time comes.***UPSIDEThis is definitely different from any other transformation I'veexperienced. I'm sitting on the floor in a little pink dress with tinywhite shoes on my feet. I look at my little hands and arms, chubby withbaby fat. I reach up and feel my soft, silky hair. Some of it is gatheredinto a little ponytail on top of my head. A diaper cushions my bottom. Iseem to be a lot more flexible than I ever remember being.I glance at the bookshelf and see the device nestled there. That reassuresme.I climb to my feet. The diaper feels odd between my legs. With the help ofa footstool, I'm able to scramble up onto the couch and settle down. I'm abit worried. Did it work? Is Cynthia my mom now?She walks into the room, towering above me and looking gorgeous. I feel adeep longing at the. But I’d only given Jill a hall pass to sleep with Chris for the first week – knowing full well that I needed to see how I’d be feeling after a week of this strange new experiment in our marriage.And with the shape of their working itinerary, Thursday night was the night I had to make the call about what I’d let Jill and Chris do on the rest of the trip. Whatever I decided, the locations of their Friday and Monday meetings meant that Chris would drive across from Wisconsin to Michigan over the weekend.If I didn’t give them the green light to continue, we’d agreed a change to the original plans. That Jill would fly back to Miami on Friday night and head back late on Sunday to be ready for the first meeting in Trenton, MI on Monday. But if I did give them the green light to carry on as a couple, then Jill would stay the night with Chris on Friday and then they’d drive across to Michigan together over the weekend.Despite the reassurance I’d gotten from the way Jill and I had managed to.
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