I began to wonder what made me have those queer feelings, even as a child I had always felt more comfortable in the company of females. Did Emma sense it too? Is that what made her approach me, not only that, but risking her own career if anyone had found out? How I worried about the small liberties I felt she took in mother's house when she came to dinner etc., was I being too analytical?It's just what had happened had felt so natural to me, it was after wards that the guilt feelings would surface, at the time our love making felt so good, so natural I just couldn't help myself. I was beginning to accept the fact I was queer, and my concern now was how to keep it hidden from the others girls in my barracks. Other girls had formed friendships and I looked for signs that some of them may also be more than platonic, but so far found nothing obvious.In Emma's letters to me she was always pestering me for details of my personal life, asking me about the other girls, and if I made any. The porch light turned on, and Tim opened the door. He stood there and she watched him watching her for several long moments. Then he asked, ‘You coming?’ and Melissa took the keys out of the ignition, and got out of the car. He stepped out of the way, and let her in, closing the door behind her. Overhead, a sleek black shape flew across the face of the moon. It wasn’t an airplane, and it was too large to be a bird. * * * Melissa set out the dishes for dinner, and called to Tim, who was sitting in the other room, where he had remained all day, watching television. She received no answer that time, nor when she called again after dishing out their food. So she quietly ate by herself, and then cleared away her dishes, leaving his plate on the table for when – or if – he roused himself. She went into the living room and turned off the porno which was blaring on the TV. She paused to look at her husband, passed out in his chair. There was a big wet spot spreading out from his crotch,.
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