I dunno. My friends used to be closer. I like it though, the quiet." I guess it's okay," I admitted."Feeling homesick?" Luke asked."A little," I admitted. "I guess I'm just used to it--when there's always something going on, you know?" So you miss your friends?" Them too," I said, nodding. "And my grandma. It's kinda weird. She used to drive me crazy. And after my mom died and I had to move in with her, I didn't think that I could ever think of it as home. But I sort of got comfortable there." And then you had to come up here," Luke said. "I guess it couldn't have been easy... but, you know, you could get comfortable here too. Maybe even think of it as home." I don't know about that. I mean, it's just a lot, you know? I don't think I'd want to stay here any longer than the summer." That's because you're too busy being pissed off at Eddie to enjoy yourself," Luke remarked.I sank under the water for a second and then came back up and looked at him."I can't help it," I stated. "And I. I don’t know if you left me because you thought it was a lock that I would have made you go away. It would not have been, in spite of everything I did with the Pills and the condoms and the pulling out. It would not have been, once I had a field of blue or a urine-stained plus sign. True, I was never in that frame of mind to meet the awesome responsibilities which you would have required, but then I was never charged with that requirement. I might have been able to do it, but it would have been just the two of us for sure. I have always imagined you as Dmitri or Natalia, partly based on the love your father and I share for anything Russian Romantic. Tchaikovsky’s Romeo and Juliet Fantasy Overture is something we both adored when we were together. I have no doubt that if he were involved, his big love would have crept in — your middle name for sure would have been Mahler. I would have fought that battle with him, but I would have lost. I can’t listen to Symphony No. 10, the one that.
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