I thought about what we spoke about. I would not go through the pain and fear. I would not risk humiliation and being attacked by those who thought themselves as "real men" if my "condition" was learned. It is not worth the risk of loosing family and friends. It is much simpler to be what society says is normal. Some say I could go on living as a "normal" man and be happy, but I tried that, and living as a man was incomplete. I even had a wife, and we have a child through our marriage. My transitioning did not cause the divorce. That is a fact. It happened many years before I decided to finally make that change, but I believe my condition was probably a factor in our split. She never knew about this aspect of me. We are still friends and have, for the most part, the same group of friends.There are those who say my transitioning would be a lie. They say that a model on the runway is still a man even if she had the operation. However, to me being male is the lie. The shell shows the lie. I don’t know that I could run around naked and let half a dozen of them fuck me and not have any say in it. Even Mike,” I said.“How about you come over to my place on Saturday, we could have a little bit of time together before Tom gets home from work. Then he will have us both and we will have had a chance to be alone and have some fun together without us being full of Tom’s cum,” Jan said smiling at me.“My period will be over by then so that will be great. Since you and I have been getting together I have found I am enjoying everything more than I ever did. I have been looking at a few porn sites and getting some ideas for doing things with you. Those girls are amazing together. I really get off watching them,” I said.As we were leaving and paying the bill the waitress said to me,“Are you Sarah, Mike's girlfriend?”I had noticed as Jan and I chatted she had been very attentive. Probably more so than the average waitress. Maybe she had overheard some of our conversations.I replied..
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