Even educated fleas do it.Cole PorterNo, Damnit. I don't mean falling in love. Fuck. I can't get laid. Not for lack of trying. I'm a typical perpetually horny young man. Masturbation was a better choice than death by priapism. I'm stuck between my little heads frustrated search for a zipless fuck and my big heads futile search for a story book romance with a strong earth woman mother of my children.My little heads charging for the goal. My big heads testing each kiss against until death do us part. Not to make excuses, but I'm convinced there's some conspiracy that keeps me from having sex ... Could the problem be all inside my head? Well, maybe it just takes the right woman...I met her one warm summer Saturday morning at the college sailing club. I was skippering one of eight boats giving introductory sailboat rides to prospective members. The boat was a Penguin, an 11 foot cat rigged hard chine dingy; or a small tippy sailboat with one sail to you landlubbers. Sail boats are. I rushed in, thinking the worst. There was no sign of Angela but the studio had been totally wrecked. The casts she had shown me that waited burnishing had been smashed. The floor was littered with shards of plaster; even the furnace had been toppled onto its side. My relief at not finding Angela in the middle of all this mess was replaced by a sense of panic. I called the police on my mobile and waited outside for them to arrive.Had this been the middle of London, I don't think they would have managed to raise any interest but this was rural Norfolk. Things like this don't happen there. They were with me in less than ten minutes. There were two uniformed Bobbies and a plain-clothes man who quickly took charge. I explained about Angela's no show at the Pub and what I'd done since. He looked narrowly suspicious but warmed a little when he took my details. There really wasn't much I could tell them so I told them everything. Meeting her on the beach, my visit the previous afternoon,.
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