Many questions remain through my mind: how could my own mother do thisto me, her only kid? why the hell did she begin a relationship withDavid and why she married him so that I was obligated to move along withher to his place, into this farming shity town? why is this happening tome? changing sex without undergoing surgery and hormone treatment cannothappen in reality, does it? And yet this is what happened to me...This cannot be the will of God after all? I refuse to believe this, eventhough my mother, David, the community and Pastor John give me thatmessage. Should this be his will, I would be born as a girl instead ofgrowing up first as a boy until I was seventeen years old?I know that my transformation fits into the plan of Pastor John topunish me for the sake of my critical attitude toward him and his Churchduring the past months. To change me in a girl, within this conservativecommunity, it will be easier for him to force me to start to behave asan obedient citizen and a. " he said, looking her right in the eye. "There's two kinds of sluts. Sluts for one cock, and sluts for all cocks. You know that, right?" I've never heard it put that way, but I'd say that's correct." she admitted dryly. "I've never been a slut for all cocks, just one. Your father's, and I miss him so much." She started to tear up, so he moved up the bed and hugged her. She hugged him back fiercely, burying her face in his shoulder and sobbing as he stroked her hair and the back of her head. He let her cry herself out, holding her as long as she needed, and finally she sat up and looked at him, red eyed and runny nosed."Your father used to hold me just like that." she said fondly, and that started a fresh bout of tears. She sat there and controlled it after a minute, wiping her face with both hands. "I'm sorry. I'm kind of a mess right now." You look beautiful, Mom." he said, and leaned forward to kiss her forehead."No, I'm a mess." she assured him. "I look a fright, but my emotions.
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