In my room I had a name and street address, I needed to know more and the investigative nature of the female in me took over.At school the network of girly information soon led me to a young guy who happened to have a paper round for that area and with general coversation I learned through time more about the man who now gripped my fantasies.He was widowed, lived alone, liked girly magazines, was a good tipper and always showed an interest and gave advice to his young paper boy.The weeks passed with me looking and waiting and finally one morning I saw him again and this time the shelter was empty. I was the only occupant and he was in full view in his window, just him and I, as even the street below was empty.His darkened form faced me as the light from over his shoulder hid everything I wanted to see, and I assumed he could not see me as I sat in the darkness of the shelter.I strained my eyes to see more, especially as his shoulders and arm movement would indicate he was actively. "Goddamnit Hannah I told you to stop with this shit. This shit is fucked up!" I’m sorry…" Karajan looks at me firm again. "I didn't mean to, honest!" I lie. Then I gave him a little smile and we rub our noses together. We suck on the blood creeping down my lip. It tastes really good."That’s a good girl. I love you Hannahbanana." I love you too Da…" Don’t even." Okay!"Now Karajan hits the play button again. Karajan likes to watch the 1968 Franco Zephirelli Romeo & Juliet on VHS tape constantly. Everyday. I think it’s kind of weird, honestly--and even pedophilic--but just a little. Plus, I don’t like it when I’m in a room with someone and they aren’t paying attention to me. Karajan is the only one in the whole world who doesn’t pay attention to me. It makes me confused, and sad.But I know how to get his attention.“Daddy?”Karajan is picking me up now with both arms, and I wrap my long slender arms around his neck. I'm sad--Karajan isn't even angry; When he's angry I know he.
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