I pushed the canoe out into the water.“Can you canoe?” I mumbled in Angie’s direction.“What did you say?” she asked.“Do you know how to canoe?” I said again, taking the life preserver strap from between my teeth.There was that giggle again.“You had that strap between your teeth. It sounded like you said, “Canoe, canoe?”“Sorry,” I said with a chuckle.“Just walk down the center of the canoe, while I steady it for you. The main concern is to try to keep your body centered in the middle of the canoe.”I held her hand as she stepped into the canoe. It was warm and soft. I thought I felt a momentary transfer of energy. She slowly proceeded to move to the front of the canoe. Once there, she cautiously seated herself. She was dressed in a nice pair of form fitting jeans, and a loose sweater. On her head she wore a Vikings cap, which I found very pleasing. So far, I was very happy with what I was seeing.“I’m going to push off from shore and jump in. Just try to stay centered in the canoe.”My. Just going to drop off a few things, he said. See youtomorrow morning.The relief was a disaster. He thought of caring as more of a militaryassault course, barking out orders to me and treating me as some kind ofobstacle that had to be attacked, surrounded and defeated. The physiosessions were agony. How this guy was tolerated as a carer I have noidea. He completely ignored my wishes, not that he actually asked mewhat they were. It was his way or the highway as far as he wasconcerned. As the day wore on in increasing amounts of frustration Irealised how much I missed Paul; his conversation, his smile, his softhands and his caring personality were things that I had come to value.At the end of the day I was praying for it to end so that Paul would beback. As I lay on my bed, unable to sleep after a horrible day, my mindstarted to spin. Why did I miss Paul so much? Was it just because of arough day with someone new? I knew some patients fall in love with their nurses, is that.
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