Which I will. But more about that later.Anyway, we had to break formation when we got to the church doors, so my nudity became obvious to everyone in very short order. I heard some gasps and comments, and tried to ignore them. One of the ushers almost dropped her stack of programs at the sight of me. Pastor Bill greeted me with a warm handshake and some words of encouragement. He's a sweetie, very up-to-date, obviously.Daddy marched us down to our usual place in the pews, about halfway down on the right of the center aisle. Because I was doing a reading I held back and settled on the aisle, with Carl next to me, and tried to calm myself, to absorb the tranquility and reverence that I found so comforting on Sunday mornings.It was a little hard, because I couldn't avoid hearing the rustling and stirring and talking as the word went around about me. Still, I managed as things settled down.Oh, the church is pretty traditional, I guess. Nothing fancy, no big stone arches or anything.The. They just told me I have less than a year." Less than a year? What do they mean less than a year? Is it that you'll need treatment for less than a year? You can do that. We can do that. I will be with you every step of the way Becky." No John. They meant that I have less than a year to live. I'm... dying."I sat in stunned silence. Of all the things I expected to hear, this was the farthest from my mind. It never occurred to me that whatever it was that was bugging my love would kill her. It had to be a wrong diagnosis. She wasn't that ill. It had to be a mistake. It had to be."John, they told me I have several types of cancer in me. They're each killing me bit by bit. The specialist told me that I have at most a year and a half. I could die in a month though too." No. Not that. We'll find other doctors. There has to be a way to fight this. People survive cancer all the time. You will survive this Becky." I don't think so John. I can feel it inside me at times. I don't think I'm going.
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