I am not a clothes horse model. I am a photographic model, a glamour model." My understanding of that was models who posed in bikini's or occasionally topless. So naively said."You would make any bikini look good." She smiled."Thank you, it's nice of you to say that. But I rarely wear any clothes when I am working."The expression dumbstruck was the perfect description for me at that moment. I sat there and I am certain that my mouth hung open, unable to say a word. Ally said the word."I guess Gob smacked is appropriate, isn't it, Jack?" After I had gathered my composure I nodded."I think it is the right word, surprise, bombshell, astonishment, all of those things as well." But not disgust, you didn't say disgust." No, Ally. Why should I say disgust? I haven't got to my age without realising that someone's got to pose for the photographs in magazines that I have read. If I didn't feel disgust for my actions in buying and reading them, then it would be hypocritical for me to label the. Com/document/d/1XaZJFnnstR3IWzN9oVUDWRljGeoaWh5e75olgRJcd2Y/edit?usp=sharingAnd then, the next day, my husband hit me. The kind of hit that makes you realize it’s not going to get better and you need to get out or you’ll be stuck forever. So I left.After leaving him I moved in with my parents, and I went nuts sleeping with as many guys as I could for about three months. And I also ended up getting blackmailed into meeting another guy, and I guess you could call that **** number two.Those three months were the worst of my life, I was mourning my marriage, I was having flashback episodes because of the **** and the trauma of the relationship I was in. I was suicidal at best. Sometimes just staring at walls for hours, sometimes hurting myself. And of course, having lots of pointless sex.Then I met my current partner, and fell in love. We were instant, absolute best friends, and he’s helped give me the strength to climb out of that disaster and become a functioning individual. Even in.
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