"Ughh, forget it!" she exclaims as she storms out of your quarters."Did she... did she want us both to...?" you dumbfoundedly ask your roommate."Trust me, it wouldn't have been worth it," he says, looking exhausted and a little more relieved than annoyed at the interruption. "She always looks so meek and submissive, but in bed..." he shakes his head, "you'd have to be some sort of genetically engineered super-man to satisfy her."You can't help but chuckle at that. Your roommate is about as fit as any other security crewman on this ship, but by no stretch of the imagination is he a super-man."So what happened with you? You didn't try that stupid thing with her antennae, did you?" he asks."Well..." I told you, Andorians don't like that shit. She threw you out, didn't she?" Yeah, literally." Ouch! I don't know what you were thinking, man. You've seen her lift weights. She could tear you in half if she wanted to." I know. That's part of the attraction." Jeez, sometimes I think you have a. As I said, boring! Then it happened. We went out for coffee one day and she asked me, “are you sure that your vasectomy hasn’t failed, Goyse?”“Why are you asking that Shirley?”“I missed my period this month so I went to the chemist shop and got one of those test things. It proved positive.”“Hey, Shirley, you’re pregnant. Come here and let me hug you.” I took her into my arms and held her tight. When we broke our hug I had tears in my eyes as I said, “Ted’s going to be a dad again. You’re going to give him another child.”“You think its Ted’s and not yours?”“It’s not mine I can tell you that and unless you have had sex with someone else it has to be Ted’s.”“Shit, what’s he going to say to me?”“He’s going to be ecstatic. Isn’t that what he wanted?”“He wanted you to impregnate me?”“Shirley, if you don’t tell him I won’t. Do you see that this works for everyone? I’m off the hook. Ted is happy and you and I are the only people in the world who know the truth. Don’t you want to be a mum.
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