If we are really dying, let us hear the rattle in our throats and feel cold in the extremities; if we are alive, let us go about our business.Walden, Henry David Thoreau.She was asleep, he nearly so; I sat in the corner, trying and failing to concentrate on my book. There were a thousand places I would rather be than here, but she needed him, and he needed me.(In retrospect, these many years later, I think we were both fooling ourselves, he and I. It was the other way around: he needed her, and I needed him.)I checked the clock—twenty minutes, and I would have to leave. I hated hospitals. Even the prospect of seeing an attractive nurse failed to compensate for the oppressive atmosphere of concentrated misery.As his head dipped, he started and looked up. He too checked the clock and apparently arrived at the same conclusion. Gently lowering her hand to the bed, he began to stand up, clearly stiff from sitting so long.I stood to lend him a hand, but he waved me off. "Stop treating me. “My advice to you, honey, is just go with the flow. You might not be sure of what you want, but from everything I’ve seen and you’ve told me, Dave loves this new lifestyle. Knowing he’s got a sexy, naughty wife, who other men lust after and who goes with other guys when the mood takes her. By the sound of it, he’s not that bothered about whether he gets his rocks off with other women, so I don’t think you’ve got too much to worry about on that score. So just go with it, honey, and see where it leads.”“I guess you’re right about Dave. And maybe I should go with it like you suggest,” Jill replied, the quiver in her voice revealing her uncertainty.“That’s the spirit, live a little, Jill, honey. Now that the kids have grown up and left home, let your hair down and have a little fun. Stop worrying so much and live a little, I’m sure it’ll all be okay in the end,” her friend reassured her.As the conversation moved on to other topics, with plenty more laughter and another glass of wine,.
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