. could you free Cuba, too, you know, get rid of Castro?” Sabrina Ruiz-Drake now asked me, much to my amusement.“Absolutely! In fact... !” I winked at Sabrina while swatting her tush.I redrew the map now to incorporate Cuba, Jamaica, Haiti, Puerto Rico, the Dominican Republic, the Caymans, Grenada, Aruba, Barbados, the Bahamas, etc. into one entity: the Dominion of United Islands. I then selected Hector Elizondo to run the place, in his capacity as Captain-General of the Dominion. I figured that the actor wouldn’t live forever, of course, but he might surprise people, and while he lived, he’d be more than capable of doing the job. Cuba’s Communist days weren’t the only bad relics of the past to be terminated at last, including Puerto Rico’s second-class citizenship in the former United States and Haiti’s history of corrupt regimes and abject poverty.“Thank you, papi! Now, let me taste Tang on your dong!” Sabrina sucked me for several seconds to lick up every last trace of her. 400 in April. It's not unheard of.I was hitting .476 on May 1. It might not have been unheard of, but it was pretty damned unusual. Worse than that, I was giving people fits at the plate. Once, in a game against Toronto, their starter was ahead of us, 6-4 in the sixth inning, but he was starting to tire. There were two out and nobody on when it was my turn at bat. I told Paul I was going to finish him."Can't hit a three-run homer with nobody on," Paul said, smiling."Can't hit a homer at all," I said. "But I'm going to finish him, anyway."I started fouling off pitches, deliberately. The count on me was no balls, two strikes, and it stayed that way for 14 more pitches -- every one of them a souvenir for the fans along the first and third base lines. On pitch number 17, which would have been a ball, outside and low -- I singled over the second baseman.As I stood on first, the Toronto manager came and got his weary pitcher.Another thing I loved doing was crossing up the opposition's.
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