I followed the cooking instructions on the leg tag and want to tell you it tasted horrible.”The bands are now marked “Fish & Wildlife Service”.“I’ve got this thing for tall, lean men.” said the new coder at the software company. “That Mike in sales is certainly a long tall drink of water.”“I hate to bust your bubble honey” replied the office veteran “but for a long tall drink of water, he’s got an awful short straw.”After his annual physical, the sexually active bachelor was waiting in the doctor’s office for the results. “Well,” said the doctor “I have good news and bad news for you.”“The way I feel, please give me the good news first.” replied the bachelor.“The good news,” announced the doctor “is that your penis has grown an additional four inches since your last exam.”“Great!” the man shouted “What is the bad news?”“It’s malignant.” replied the doctor.I was sitting in McDonalds the other day when a gang of about 20 skinheads chased an Indian guy past me, cornered him and kicked. However, Mum forbade me to say anything back, and told me to cool it, saying it didn't bother her and that they were only baiting us. I uneasily agreed it would be silly to rise to the provocation.Secretly though, I knew Mum was enjoying the attention, and I was very jealous but began secretly whacking off at night about it. Also, I noticed how she'd begun to dress much more sexily, even tartily, and would swing her hips more, on any day she was likely to pass by the gang. I always now neurotically plied her with questions about what happened, what they'd said etc, whenever she'd had to pass them on the lane without me. I'd be in a worried, harrassed state quite genuinely, but have a mysterious bulge in my pants too as I obsessively queried her!One day when we went past, the youths were playing with a plastic ball that they were throwing to each other in the Den as we walked up the lane. Three of the girls were walking up behind us, having been to the shop for cigarettes. As we.
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