A cook," I ordered, then remembering added, "and a guard ... an armed guard. Call Stan in security and arrange something. I want that tree protected 24/7."I could see the curiosity in everyone's eyes as I spoke. "She's gotta eat ... I mean what the hell can she cook seventy feet up in the air?" I think they eat dried fruit and nuts sir, they're usually vegetarians," one bright eyed marketing genius offered. He'd certainly never met my meat eating daughter."What's the guard for sir?" a fairly new employee, Ashley, a short haired blond girl who looked like she was sixteen, asked me."To make goddam sure no wild grizzly bear gets the idea into its pea sized brain to climb the effing Scouries tree and eat my little daughter." I don't think there are any bears around there sir," another whiz kid told me."She's not that little sir," another added. I knew whose naked pictures this soon to be unemployed prick had been watching all morning."Or one of the fifty thousand registered sexual. He would end up in the curry house with his friends, then to stagger home to his disillusioned wife, a half-watched DVD before sleep overwhelmed him on the sofa, beer-shits in the morning and an enforced day of domesticity. But he had hit upon a good question. My warm gassy lager was suddenly unappealing, and I had clearly had the last meaningful conversation in that pub for that night. I stood and began to walk out. It was just about the longest pub in town, swirling colours mixed with hope and desperation, failure and compromise. I plugged myself in and began to move, a step ahead. I found each gap between the glassy-eyed revellers and I noted them driving each other higher into the realms of the unreal, shouting out their deepest desires to others shouting just as loudly. I swerved and spun and pirouetted and was never touched, my balance impeccable, my decision making perfect, and after a mere four minutes my greatest ability left me standing in the neon glare of the impersonal.
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