Suzanne slowly came to realize that she did not deserve what was happening to her. She had done nothing wrong. It was her father who was bad, not her. She never talked to anyone about what was going on in her father’s den, but even at her young age she had the ability to perceive the truth about people and situations, a trait that would later help her as a photographer. During the sessions in the last months before her 14th birthday, she repeated over and over in her mind ‘I don’t deserve this…I don’t deserve this.’ She forced herself to stop crying during the paddlings. Then, as abruptly as the punishments began, they stopped. There never was any discussion about what was going on or any explanation, but she bent over her father’s desk for the last time just before her 14th birthday. For years afterwards she silently lived in dread of another punishment, but after she turned 14 Suzanne never again felt her father’s paddle. Still, her problems did not end. The physical torment had. Sure, she had her cosmetics on with expert artistry but I could tell that she was one of those rare creatures that looked equally as delectable without any make-up at all.Suddenly she pushed me up and away and I thought she might have a cramp.When she put the pillow under her head and opened her knees wide for my insertion, I knew that she wanted me to spear her with missionary zeal. Fortunately, I was in a state between semi-erection and full attention but I knew it was now or never. The generational differences never seemed wider at that moment of truth. She was reciting something in her language that sounded almost musical in the way she hummed it in my joyous ear. I wanted to shout out, “Houston, we have a problem!”My forward progress was slowed because her opening was a bit too tight and even with the overflow of natural lubrication all over the area of operations; I was unable to make a landing on the beach of love. Fortunately, she was more determined than shy and she grabbed.
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