In truth, I wanted to ignore everything I was feeling. I am not one to wear my heart on my sleeve, let along actually admit the current situation was painful to me. Self denial has always been my route. Therefore I began making excuses as to why he wasn’t around anymore, when in angered truth I didn’t know myself. The lies were comforting, but even I knew they wouldn’t restrain the agony running ramped through my veins, like a hurricane just below the surface. The world and I have never come to an agreement, it kept spinning when I had long since been thrown off. Regardless of my rough exterior, a friend came through. Offering the stone cold theory that James was my drug, and I was literally going through withdrawals in his absence. The reality of that statement came crashing down, just as he took one last step off the planet, and surprisingly my world didn’t come to a halt. So what was the point in all of this? Well, it’s rather simple. You see, every fiber of my being is afraid,. This spoiled our plans for the remainder of the day (which so far had consisted of nothing more than lounging around and occasionally screwing one another). So we cinched up the fronts of our robes and climbed upstairs to get dressed for the day. Gwen turned from the second floor hallway into a bathroom and turned on the shower. I continued up another flight of stairs to my assigned guest room on the third floor, which as luck would have it was located right next to Chelsea's bedroom. As if she were expecting me, Chelsea met me at the top of the stairs clad only in a pair of socks and the denim jeans she had worn to school - she was naked from the waist up, standing in a pose that just begged me to pull the last pieces of clothing from her body. We slipped into the door of my bedroom and engaged in a sloppy kiss. She fumbled with the knot that held together the front of the bathrobe that I had borrowed from her dad's closet, while I fastened my lips around her perky young breasts..
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