Good shoes. Check. Hooker bag. Check. “Bye Fran, the cab’s here.”Cabby said he gets very few calls from my neighborhood. I had to agree. This was a first for me. The meter said $18.20 when we arrived. He got a 20. We shared thank you’s.I walked toward a comfortable looking house in a pleasant neighborhood. Sam opened the door for me. Normally this would be the time to kiss a client. Somehow a non-sensuous hug seemed more appropriate. He held me for a long time.He started, “My wife...” then started crying. I saw a tissue box. As I gave him a tissue he started again, “My Caroline, my wife, was killed by a drunk driver 10 days ago. We have no family on the island. Our friends brought food and a little comfort. They are gone now. I’m so lonely I don’t know what to do. Please help me.”Tears came to my eyes too. Hookers, even part-time hookers like me, are supposed to be hard as nails. I needed the tissues as much as he did. Am I grieving with someone I met 30 seconds ago? Am I a grief. Fuck.I followed her outside. She had her arms crossed and her feet up in another patio chair. “Mom… I’m not going to cheat on you…” I whispered, hoping that was the words she wanted to hear.“What? No. No. That’s not what I meant, at all.” She looked up at me with confusion, and took a drag off her cigarette. “It’s not fair to Becca, or any girl you’re dating. It’s just wrong. It doesn’t matter who I am. You don’t cheat on people and you don’t hurt them. And I’m cheating you out of a real relationship, or real experiences by expecting you to follow all my rules.”I wanted to tell her I would spend my entire life missing out on real experiences and relationships if it meant she’d be the one making me cum. Becca was hot, but she was shit in bed, and her Bible-thumping parents had convinced her that putting a penis in her mouth guaranteed her a nice, scalding hot place in Hell. “This is why I wanted to think. I wanted to make sure I’d covered everything but apparently, I didn’t.”“But….
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