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“Life’s a bitch sometimes Chuck…” I said with a crooked smile. “Now, here’s what you’re going to say. I wrote it down so you won’t forget.” I held up the piece of paper and said “read it once so I know you’ve got it down before I dial our friend’s number.” “Sally, it’s Charles, we have a problem. Barney busted up the troller bare handed and jumped ship. The captain just called and said he was in a rage over something but wouldn’t even talk about it. I’m leaving town for a while, come over as soon as you get this message, don’t pack, I’ll buy you whatever you need when we get somewhere other than here. That boy will likely kill us both if he’s that pissed off. Call me, or just come over, I’ll be here for a half hour getting packed.” “Not bad Uncle Charles, you better hope you make it at least that convincing when you leave the message.” I dialed the phone and held it up for the message to be left, it was and I closed the lid shutting it off. I pulled out my phone. Everything went well for a few weeks until the need for a few drinks came up. Actually I had more than a few drinks and was forced to take a taxi home. I passed out drunk on the couch. When I woke up in need of a monster piss, I discovered my lovely wife super glued my penis northward to my belly! I had no choice but to walk into the shower and let loose with a piss that would put a Russian race horse to shame. Of course my wife was laughing her ass off the whole time. I had to go to the hospital emergency room to get myself disconnected, as it were. The doctor had little difficulty getting me undone since super glue accidents happen more often than you would think. And believe it or not, I found out that the use of super glue to attached a husband’s penis to his belly is not an uncommon event either. Giving the medical staff one helluva laugh did make me feel good, but I definitely would’ve preferred it be for a totally different reason. On the way home, I remembered my wife.
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