For the first month, I fed you every three or four hours." Was I a bottle baby?"Mom laughed. "Oh no! You latched onto my nipples and wouldn't let go. I breastfed you until you were almost two." Why?" I asked."We were living on base in Florida then, and I didn't trust the water. You liked juice, especially apple, but you didn't care for a bottle. You liked my boobs best."I blushed pink, suddenly conscious of a wonderful intimacy. She finished my foot and lowered it to the floor, staring into space."I loved you," she said with a shaky voice. " I kissed you, I held you, I cleaned your messy diapers and I fed you. It's what Moms do."She wiped her eyes, stepped to the vanity and lowered her head, bracing her arms on the sink. I stood and closed the gap between us, cuddling her close. I was nude and so was she; the skin-to-skin contact was thrilling and frightening. I put my arms around her middle and pressed my breasts against her back."I love you," I said. "I always have. You're my best. I alwaysgot escorted from the club by one of the doormen who caught me a registeredcab. In the hall, there would be parties that I would be invited to join. Igot to know the guys who could be trouble and tried to stay clear or incompany. This was a fear that I knew I didn't have to have, if I could findmy way back to my life.But I couldn't find Carmela. I needed to go to where she used to work. OneMonday afternoon I had no classes and dressed up a little tidily for a tripinto her old law offices. At the reception I found Megan still looking primand proper. I had a momentary heart stoppage as I thought she would recogniseme, but of course she couldn't. "How can I help you, miss?" She asked."Does a Carmela Santiago still work here?" The name rings a bell. Carmela? She's not listed. Santiago, you say?" She may be called Scott now." I hoped not, but there wouldn't have been muchstopping Sebastien."Scott. Oh, yes, Carrie Scott! Yes, she was here a few years but left shortlyafter the.
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