"I sighed. "I know, and I'm sorry it happened with you out of town, andI'm sorry I kept it from you."I started to put the bra back on, but Alli stopped me. "Leave it off. Iwant to look at them. So, do you start wearing women's clothes now?" See? Like I said, this isn't so simple. Yes, I'm going to be wearingwhat I like, without worrying about whether it was sold in the men's orwomen's department. Sometimes I'll wear makeup. Not much. It's just toomuch trouble, but some. Sometimes I'll wear more feminine earrings," Isaid."Dresses? Skirts?" Not for the moment. The point isn't to dress like a female. It's todress the way I want to look," I said.I couldn't believe I had said all this. "So while everybody's cool withit at work, we both know there will be others who won't be, and Iunderstand if you don't want to be associated with me," I said."I'm not afraid of what people will think. If I love you, I love you,and I do. But dammit, of course you have to know I'm unhappy about youconcealing. I couldn't wake up and I kept having them one after another ... you were raping me and hurting me, keeping me in the bed so I couldn't get up. It was awful ... awful..."Her voice faltered, tears streaming down her cheeks, and she glanced nervously up at his face for just a moment before continuing, "When I woke up I was so scared ... I completely panicked and I just had to get away. Then I was out in the woods and I was terrified I would get attacked by something and I guess that just kept me going and I made it here.Jake, can you ever forgive me for leaving? I know you would never do those things to me..."JAKEI stood stock still for a long time, even after she finished her explanation. I was shocked at the things her subconscious mind had conjured up and wasn't sure how to react.Finally I registered the look on Alie's face and it was a look that pleaded for understanding. "First of all there is nothing to forgive ... you reacted in a natural way. However, you must promise me that in.
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