Mom always says I need to “get to the point” and I guess she’s right. I’ve been told that I’m very good at being “weird” and “lovable” at the same time haha. Sometimes I’m unintentionally funny more often than I am intentionally funny to my eternal dismay and confusion. Why are they all laughing I ask myself?? What did I say that’s so funny? So anyways I have several girlfriends that I’ve had for a long time and we really love and support each other. Even though they think I’m weird and crazy they love me to death and I love them for accepting me as I am. Maybe one day I’ll find a guy like that? Who knows? Do such guys exist? Can you get one at Walmart? How about Saks? Okay so this story is about my “first time”, but with a GIRL, not a guy. Got it? Actually this happened first (before I lost my “V” to a guy) and it happened when I was sixteen. I won’t use my friend’s real name (to protect the innocent haha, well she’s anything but innocent, but hey?) so let’s just call her. "The Annual Council meeting at Town Hall was a shambles, there must have been half the perverts in England hanging about outside the building, Police dogs, Police horses trampling people and shitting everywhere, what a shambles, but I wore me overalls and sneaked in round the back and they never recognised me.The Council was boring, the big thing was electing the Chairman and that but I slipped away to the bogs when they elected chairman and the Tory bloke got it, which really pissed the Lib Dems off.."Why did you abstein?" an ageing blonde reporter asked me."Got offered ten grand didn't I?" I explained."Oh!" she gasped, "Why?" Well," I said sarcastically, "Let me shag you and I'll tell you!" Ok, cloak room's best," she said, and she grabbed my hand and dragged me down corridor.Turned out she had bad PMT and wanted a fuck, she never even asked about the ten grand, I suppose I should have used a rubber really but well, it's easy to be wise afterwards."What are your plans now, John?".
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