I felt tired, and sat down in a beautiful (but uncomfortable) chair by Hofmann. Not at all like the ones at Purkersdorf. But I saw a small carved table-top easel, about the right size for a Missal, and purchased it for Maria Josepha. But I had nothing for either Karl nor Max. I purchased a silver cigarette case for Karl – at 18, I presumed he smoked. Max was still a problem. He was but ten.I paid and asked a clerk to have a taxi summoned. They loaded my acquisitions into it and I was deposited, fatigued, at the Augarten.I dozed for an hour and then had some salad and cold chicken. I took to my bed early and slept quite soundly. I had no visitors, but I dreamt about Sisi.I think Sisi really cared about her son. Her first reaction to hearing of his death was to turn on Larisch, her lady-in-waiting for the past few years. Larisch had had an illegitimate daughter, openly fathered by Rudolf. Rudolf paid her gambling debts (and other costs) for several years. She also served as madam to. I wondered what he would do. I started moving my hand toward my face. Our hands seemed to be tied as his moved slowly behind mine. I moved slowly but purposefully towards my face. He continued to watch, and I watched his face grow nervous as my hand drew closer to my face. Where his face had seemed inquisitive he now reacted as a boy caught with his hand in the cookie jar as I stopped my hand under my eyes. And finally his eyes joined mine. What was this connection I felt and did he feel it? Was it just a game for him? His eyes were so serious and deep. I felt his expression change to that of a boy in a toy store. Now my thoughts starting wandering to thoughts of touching him. If he could touch my hand through glass in such a powerful way, imagine how he could touch me in real life. Could I be having these thoughts about a stranger? I brought up my other hand and he ‘touched’ it also and we stood ‘touching’ hands looking into each others eyes. I heard a cup being put on my table and.
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