"Head up, shoulders back lovely girl," Sid ordered jokingly "Let'shave a look at you."Emma did as requested and raised a smile."Wow, I'm going home, can't compete with that," Paula exclaimed."Not half bad, not half bad at all." Arthur had had a few glasses ofwine by now."Stand together please, you two," requested Sid. "two things straightaway. Firstly thank-you to Jane and Betty for your marvellous work andsecondly and most importantly thanks to you two errmm ladies forhaving the balls to do this." He then realised what he had just saidand got the giggles, "Err if you know what I mean." I think we know where you're coming from dear, well trying to comefrom shall we say." Betty was laughing as well. "A toast is in order."Glasses were filled, clinked and enjoyed.For the rest of the evening Paula and Emma were coached in how to sit,how to stand up gracefully, how to walk. They were encouraged to partthe hostess role and get drinks for everyone.While they were in the kitchen getting more. .I STILL needed dick, so I tried to pick and choose the ones who seemed least offensive. Saturday was bad -- I made one bad and one so-so choice in partners and only the fact that I had to have my fix kept me going. Sunday, the slow trickle of guys started and I got to see a couple who were on their first pass and needed some comfort.Sis told me, "You need to give in order to get." That seemed to be the breakthrough. I took to just consoling the new guys -- and if sex resulted, it was under more favorable circumstances than after 'Hey, Buddy -- wanna fuck?' I started getting more involved in the whole thing, emotionally -- something I really needed, now that I look back on it. Before, I was walled off, emotionally, focused on doing whatever it took to get my fix -- and trying not to think about how I was lying, cheating and stealing and using people. I couldn't get emotionally involved with anyone under those circumstances, as it would only hurt us both. Once my 'fix' had an emotional.
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